Blackout

The past few weeks have been unusually quiet. Although I continued hearing the noise and music of society, in one area it was blacked out from me. Society online.

I made a pact with myself not to go on any form of social networking for 2 weeks. A seemingly impossible promise to keep, but as the days went on, it became easier and easier as I slowly grew out of my addiction for online communication. It went so well, and the benefits so outweighed the sacrifice (if there was any), that only now have I gradually returned to my normal level of internet usage.

The best way to explain my experience would be to compare it with new strings on a guitar. When you play guitar, the strings gradually get rusty in small increments that you don't notice. Then you realise you haven't changed the strings for 6 months. You spend 30 minutes equipping new strings, and your fingers instantly feel the difference. Every single note is easier to hit, every sound is more perfect, every melody rings truer than before. It's like that online. You don't notice the time you waste, the drag it has on life, until you change it up a bit.

The internet has obvious advantages for relationships. I can connect with my friends in Japan instantly, it keeps me organised with events and birthdays, and it can be a starting point for discussion amongst friends. But, if I'm spending over 2 hours a day, looking at a screen that is ultimately comprised of 0's and 1's? That's never helpful.

I was challenged to turn off online for a while, and I encourage you to do so too. God gave us so much more than just the internet, and it's about time we appreciated his other gifts. 

Plus, it gives you a fail proof excuse in this connected world.

Your time starts now

This isn't a timed post or anything (but I do want to go to sleep soon...), I just wanted to explore the conversation idea I latched on to my post last week.

Often my blog posts occur from conversations with myself, in my head. It might be a sign of craziness, but it gets me thinking from different viewpoints, smashing around different ideas in my head, tumbling them together until they form some sort of writable clump of information. Often theres a lot of ideas from the bible (from talks and such) that gets mixed in to the bundle which always gives my thoughts some direction on what's right and wrong.

This time, hopefully we can bring that fictional conversation from in my head into real life. Well, online is close enough to real life...

We'll have a bit from the bible to start us off, so God is the centre, and then feel free to comment your thoughts on the passage or any other ways God has made you think the past few weeks. It can be one line, or it could be an essay (maybe not...) but have a go. God is good, so I hope this discussion will work in the first place, and be encouraging to all those who participate.

Here we go!

"For just as each of us has one body with many members, and these members do not all have the same function, so in Christ we, though many, form one body, and each member belongs to all the others." Romans 12:4-5

What are your thoughts? Please take a moment to share, and come back to see what others think!

Give it a go.

Sorry for the lack of input from my side of the conversation this past month. Conversation? Well, I'm trying to make this blog more like a conversation, so if you comment, I'll try my best to respond so it isn't just me sharing my thoughts but everyone giving their two cents and learning from each other.

Anyway, today I thought I could share what I've been up to in the past few weeks.

Three weeks ago, I went on a massive camp with about 130 high schoolers from all over the state. It was my first time going to a non-Christian camp where no one knew I was a Christian. My sister challenged me to make Christ shine in my life so that by the end of the 4 days it would be obvious that I have Jesus in my life.

Sad to say, it didn't go that well to plan. I got so engrossed in the electives, the talks, the fun activities - which were all really good, but God was a no no - that I sort of kept Jesus hidden. Well, for me, it felt like I wasn't smothering him. When people asked why I had lived in Japan for 12 years, I did tell that my parents had been missionaries, but that was only when they asked. If God is meant to be a fire inside me, I was like a refrigerator, keeping the fire cool until someone opened the door.

The next week, I went on a ski trip. I went with a friend who had just recently became a Christian. With some long bus trips and being in the same cabin, I thought I would be courageous enough to talk more about what being a Christian is going to be like and encourage him. However, again, I got so caught up in the skiing that I left the more important things till last where tiredness defeated my will to talk.

Now, a week back into the normal scheme of things, I am still reminiscing the lost chances that I have squandered for my own pleasure instead. I could have started a bible study at the camp and invited people along. I could have read the bible together with my Christian friend. But I didn't.

I don't really have a real positive about this experience yet. It is another one of those situations where I keep getting back up and continuing to strive to be more like Jesus. And next time, hopefully I will just give it a go!

Made for eternity

Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.

I hope you get the joke, but I was struck today at just how fast time really does move. If it was an animal, I'm sure it would be quicker than a cheetah. I am sure I had at least a week till I had to get ready for camp, and now it is looming in front of me with a death stare saying "Are you ready?"

I feel bad trivialising the passing of time. For some, time is of the essence, and when it continues to travel along so quickly, it becomes heart breaking. The thing is, I think it's because we were made for eternity.

We were made for a place where death was not looming, things did not turn to dust, and people did not have to go away. Time did not matter. But when we fell out of that perfect relationship with our creator, our clocks turned to reserve power, which won't last forever.

I'm sure there are other things that make us feel the world is broken. Suffering, pain, broken relationships. The passing of time is another more subtle way which still shows how trashed our world has become.

With everything however, we have an assured hope that with a renewed relationship with our creator, time won't matter anymore. We will live for eternity with him.

Dear God

You are love.

You are big, really big.

You know me; you know everything!

You are the creator of all things.

Thank you for nature.

The sky, trees, clouds, fire.

Thank you for relationships.

My family, friends, getting to know strangers.

You are forgiving.

You take it upon yourself to pay my debt.

You won't let me wallow in guilt.

You help me love you more.

Sorry for my thoughts, words, and actions.

When I know I'm doing wrong.

And when I don't even notice.

Sorry for not following you fully.

Thank you for freedom.

No more worries because of you.

Thank you for changing me.

I'd be stuck otherwise.

Please give me wisdom.

And strength and courage.

To be a better disciple.

Please keep me praying.

Help others too.

Friends and followers.

In their struggles or joys.

To hold fast to you.

Amen

I am not a scientist

In the hemisphere I live in, it is winter right now. 5 layers of clothing, slippers everywhere, the clouds of steam with every breath. What I especially love is curling up right near the fireplace. Not only is it warm, but to me watching fire is an amazing thing.

Orange tentacles push against the glass, ripples spread over the burning embers, and for me, it looks like the fire is breathing.

Now you can get all sciencey on me and say that fire is just heat, some fuel, and oxygen all combusting and creating a chemical reaction, which emits light and heat energy. I have been to school long enough to know that fire isn't a monster and that it isn't alive. But once in a while I let my imagination run wild.

The point of this story is to show why I don't want to be a scientist. I look at fire and I see an animal; I look at a tree and marvel at its beauty; I look at the sky and just let its size engulf me. I don't mind its origins, its inner working, and its purpose left unexplained.

I respect scientists, and I know that without some people looking deeper into nature many good things in this world wouldn't have been invented. And I am happy to admit I am not someone like that.

I am so glad God has created everyone unique, with different skills, different ideas, and different futures so we can share and learn from each other. What skills has God given you?

Never Alone

A weight has lifted off my shoulders I never knew was there. The sunshine is brighter, the laughter is louder, and the joy is overwhelming.

I'm already a Christian so it isn't a conversion I am talking about. But the fact that another part of God's plan in making me more like him has fallen into place. I have a new understanding of God's grace.

I knew God had saved us, so striving to be more like Jesus was our goal. To glorify God our purpose. I knew that and strived to live my life in order that in everything I do, I would be a walking, talking, advertisement for the amazingness of God. When I stuffed up, I praised God that he forgives, and go back to trying to glorify him again.

Maybe I had already understood everything I needed to know, but this week I saw it from a different perspective. I understood that in the above paragraph, the only thing that matters as a Christian is the first 6 words. "I knew God had saved us".

It doesn't matter if all my ministry fails. It doesn't matter if I always struggle with prayer. It doesn't matter that I will never be the "perfect Christian". Because God has already saved me.

Maybe that is obvious to you, but it wasn't to me. Maybe the fact that I am still at school means I feel like I have to work hard to get the marks I deserve. So I need to strive to be more godly to get God to love me more.

But it isn't like that! And the greatest news of all is, now I know that, I'll be serving God out of gratitude, not out of servitude. It won't be a burden it will be an honour and blessing.

So thanks for reading this confession. That I came to understand that even if I fail, I will be Never Alone.